CHAPTER FIFTEEN
[PART TWO]
Hours Later
Justin's Penthouse Apartment
Manhattan, New York
My initial plan was to leave work and head straight to Justin's but somewhere along that trip I made a detour and ended up on a train to the Bronx. The next thing I knew, I was home alone in my living room pacing since Sean didn't get off work for a few more hours.
I was almost like a crazy person, scolding myself and asking myself what the hell I was doing. Then, I was angry again because the least Justin could have done was call.
I mean, we're together now right? I highly doubt his disappearing act is part of the whole being in a relationship vibe.
But after what Robert told me I understood, sort of.
But, in all of my crazy pacing I had an epiphany...it was this moment of clarity where everything made perfect sense and I knew exactly what I had to do.
That would probably explain why I'm standing outside of Justin's apartment door right now after showering and dressing in simple jeans and a t-shirt which is much more comfortable than my work attire. I took the train back to Manhattan, and then grabbed a cab to his place, so he better be home. More importantly, he better not be a bitch about this whole ordeal and he better be prepared to explain his irrational behavior.
Luckily, Robert actually called the guards in the lobby to ask them to let me up and that it was for Justin's own good. When I came in, I told them who I was and they simply let me through compared to the hassle they gave me the last two times I stopped by during the week.
I didn't argue though. I simply slipped into the elevators and waited patiently until I got to Justin's door.
Now, I'm standing outside about to knock, my hands visibly shaking just a little because I'm nervous. I don't know what's going to greet me on the other end of that door and while I know he's going through a rough stage in his life, I'm praying that the old Justin doesn't rear his ugly head.
Taking in a deep breath, I bang loudly on the door since Justin's apartment is huge and I want to make sure that he hears I'm outside.
When I get no response or any indication that there's life on the other end I bang again using both of my hands this time, creating a small continuous rhythm until I hear something. It sounds almost like a crashing noise but I can't be sure.
I pause, waiting for something else, anything else, but nothing comes.
Groaning at his stubbornness, I begin banging again this time with both my hands and one of my feet. If anyone witnessed this, they'd say I was crazy, but I want to grab Justin's attention long enough for me to hear his voice when he realizes the person's not leaving.
And it works, a loud angry growl sounding from somewhere close to the door.
"Whoever you are, you're fucking impossible. Would you go away before I call the police!?" He snaps angrily and I smile, still knocking on the door, not saying anything because he doesn't know it's me yet. "For fuck's sake, leave me alone! How did you even get past my guards? I'm not giving any statements ok? So..." But his voice dies out when I finally speak loudly and firmly to him from behind the barrier.
"Justin, you better open up if you know what's good for you else I swear to god, I'm going to call 911 and make them send the ambulance, fire fighters and police squad on your ass. You know they'd come too if I told them Randall Timberlake's son was in trouble." I state firmly.
And I wait, holding my breath, anticipating his next move.
Jumping back when I hear a thud against the door, I tilt my head to the side, trying to figure out what the hell he's doing in there.
"Tai?" He questions, his voice weak and groggy now.
Gosh, that man and his mood swings, what am I going to do with him?
"Yes Justin." I smile even if he can't see me since he hasn't opened the door yet.
"Why are you here? I don't want you here." He mumbles and judging by the volume of his voice, I'd say he's standing right next to the door now.
"Justin, stop being a big baby and just open the goddamn door. I'm ten seconds away from grabbing my phone and screaming emergency. Don't make me do it."
"Well, I'm not up for you yelling at me so just leave." He groans and he's a smart little devil isn't he? I had every intention of calling him out on his shit, but now that he brought it up, I'm really not that angry anymore. I think I'm more worried than anything else.
"Look Justin, I forgive you for avoiding me this week; I'm not angry anymore; I get that you're going through a tough time, but you asked me to be there no matter what, and I'm here now because I care...so...please open up..." And I trial off, hearing the lock click, but nothing else happens.
Silence engulfs me as I wait patiently for him to swing the door open but that moment never comes.
Shrugging, I try my luck with the door handle and sure enough it's unlocked.
Sighing, I twist the knob and carefully push the door open, a whiff of some type of shower gel filling my nostrils. Hmm, he just came from taking a shower?
Carefully, I walk into his apartment before shutting and locking the door behind me.
Taking a look around, I squint at the lack of light, realizing that he has the huge blinds closed, making in here seem like it's almost nighttime when it's only late afternoon.
"Justin?" I call out as my eyes scan the room for him but find no one.
Is he seriously doing this right now?
Giggling despite myself, I kick off my shoes to the side and continue looking around, relishing in the lavish penthouse apartment, hoping that one day I can at least come close to owning a nice place like this.
"In here!" He finally answers seconds later, and my feet slowly pad along in the direction of his voice. Rounding the corner, I'm met with a short hallway and three doors, one of which is ajar.
"In here where?" I ask again and I hear him moving around so I follow that sound. "Justin you're seriously doing this right now?" I ask incredulously and just when I lift my hand to push the door open, he swings it open coming to stand before me.
And I gasp, my eyes quickly looking away as my mind turns to mush and my heartbeat speeds up.
"Gosh, you could have said you were naked out of the shower dressing or something..." I mumble, fighting not to look at him since he's standing before me in only a pair of navy blue boxers.
He must want to get mauled...that's the only explanation.
And he chuckles.
He actually chuckles.
That for some reason pisses me off and clothes be damned, I snap my head back in his direction, my chestnut browns narrowing at him.
"What the fuck is your problem Justin?" I spit, and his chuckles die out, his head lowering in guilt and I begin tapping my foot impatiently while I glare at him. "Well?" I ask when he avoids making eye-contact with me, his hands gingerly playing with his bare chest which I'm trying not to stare at right now.
Oh my god, he's practically naked in front of me and it's taking everything in me not to jump him and just say fuck it. I need to know what's going on with him first but so help me if he doesn't start talking soon...
"I'm sorry." He mutters listlessly and I frown.
"You're sorry?" He needs to do a little better than that.
"I'm sorry Tai. I don't know what else to tell you." He looks at me now, really looks at me, and I sigh when I see how tired and red his beautiful blues are.
"What's going on Justin? Why have you been hiding this past week?" I question.
"I wasn't hiding." He defends and I arch a brow at him which shuts him up.
"Try again." I demand and he releases a downhearted sigh before gripping my hand and pulling me into the room with him, shutting the door behind us.
I'm only now realizing that we're in his bedroom, which is ridiculously huge with everything plush you can think of. There is one thing which grabs my attention though, the fascination on my face increasing tenfold.
"You have a ceiling mirror?" I question in confusion, rushing over to his king sized bed like I own the place, like I've been here before when I really should be nervous. "Oh my god Justin, you're some kind of freak." I say still in awe as I look up as the full length mirror, seeing my reflection.
"Don't you want me to start explaining why I've been avoiding damn near everybody in the past week? That's why you came over here isn't it?" He questions, brushing off my surprise at his little ceiling ornament hanging directly above his bed.
Straightening my posture, I whip around to face him, noting the irritation on his face as he crosses his arms over his chest while he glowers at me. Aw, he's still a cutie. But I don't get why he's still so upset.
And I can't help it anymore. I completely and wholeheartedly indulge in the sight of him, taking in every inch and definition of his physic from head to toe. He's absolutely breathtaking, from the tiny curls on his head, to his pouty pink lips, down to his sculpted arms and six pack, all the way down to his slim waist with his boxers riding low, allowing me a small peak of the hair trail that disappears beneath the waistband of his boxers to his nether region. Gosh, I thought he was gorgeous with clothes on, but that was nothing compared to how he looks now, fresh and standing there like a big white chocolate bar I'd just eat up. Ugh. Pure torture.
When he catches my staring fest, he smirks, rolling his eyes in amusement.
"Would you rather I put clothes on since I highly doubt you'll hear a word I say if I stay like this? I mean, this is how I usually am around the house, but if it bothers you..." He drifts, chuckling lightly when I quickly shake my head ‘no' as I continue to gaze at him in bewilderment, still a little dazed by the sight of him.
"It's been a week Justin." I snap out of my thoughts, getting down to business. "So, start talking." I supply, moving around the bed to take a seat on one of the cushiony chairs in his room.
He follows suit, moving around to sit at the edge of his king-sized bed facing me...and with a deep breath, he completely spills his heart...
"I'm sorry Tai. I really am. I didn't know what else to do. I literally wanted to kill my father for putting me and Rob through so much shit our entire lives. Trying to take you away from me was the last straw. I thought about going to my dad's place, about calling him out on his bullshit. I thought about injuring him, taking out all of my frustration on him. In fact, after I dropped you guys home that night, I made it all the way to his estate and just sat in my car staring at a place I once called home, which isn't my home anymore. I can't tell you the last time I set foot on his estate. But, in the middle of my anger and hatred something clicked. And I realized I couldn't do it...not yet at least. I didn't want to try and talk to my dad when I was so worked up because I would have maybe gone off on him. He may be a monster, but, he's still my dad. I'm not sure if you understand..."
"So, eventually, I left. I went home, threw off all of my clothes and went to bed still mad but not really understanding why anymore since my mind was made up that I was going to do what the hell I wanted from now on. I guess I'm just hurt over the fact that he'd do this to us. But, I don't hate him. I thought I did, but, I don't think I could ever hate my dad even if I tried because I sort of understand why he's this way."
He pauses briefly, frowning when he sees that my eyes are trained on his chest as I take in the way it expands and contracts with each deep breath he takes.
Damn it, I want to touch him so bad right now.
"Anyway..." Justin continues and I look up at him with a coy smile, completely forgetting why I was even angry at him in the first place.
He needed time. He needed to sort things out and I'm ok with that. I just wish that he would have told me something but, at least we're here now...together.
"The only reason why I didn't come into work this week was because of this Nella bullshit. The media has been trying relentlessly to get a hold of me, and since I was so worked up, I didn't want to say shit that would make the situation worse. Plus, I wasn't ready to face my dad's accusations until I knew for sure what I was dealing with. So, on Monday, I dragged Nella down to the hospital with me to get that paternity test. And, I wasn't going to see or speak to anyone until I knew for sure if the kid was mine...because this shit is killing A-List's image and my reputation and believe when I say I let Nella have a piece of my mind for going through with this. I'm sorry about lying to you by the way. I didn't want you to have something extra to worry about..." He trails, his voice going lower as he gazes at his hands like they're the most interesting things in the world and I wait on bated breath for him to tell me what I so desperately need to know. "The uh, the baby's not mine Tai. I got the results today. And, and I know I should be thrilled right? But, I'm kind of not. I was sort of getting used to the idea of maybe being a dad and doing all the things for the kid that my dad never did for me."
"I don't know. I guess it hurt a little to know that Nella was indeed cheating on me and, got pregnant on top of it. Not like I should care anymore because, because I have you and all..." He grips my hand in his, giving me a soft smile and I return the gesture, getting lost in his intense gaze. "It's just the principle of the matter." He finishes and I nod, understanding where he's coming from.
"It's ok." I finally speak up. "You have a right to be angry after going through all of that for nothing."
But I will admit that I'm ecstatic about the news and he will be soon too, once the drama clears up...I hope.
"It was a good learning experience for me." Justin shrugs, releasing his hold on me to stand and I follow him, not quite sure what the hell he's going to do next. "So, are you still mad at me?" His tone is cautious as he stands awkwardly, glaring at me with wide questioning eyes and how can I possibly stay mad at him?
I hate that all he has to do is look at me and I completely break down. When the hell did I ever allow him to have this much power over me?
Grinning, I lean up, gripping his face to pull him down for a kiss.
It's a gentle, sensual kiss which Justin breaks to let out a sigh of relief. "Is that a Justin I'm not mad at you and I forgive you kiss? Or, a Justin you need to shut up and you're too irresistible, I can't keep my hands off of you kiss?"
"A little of both." I admit, pulling him down again for another kiss, his breath hitching in his throat as his large hands graze over my breasts and make their way down to my waist where he grips me tightly, pulling me closer.
My heart starts beating erratically when I fuse with his bare chest as he deepens the kiss, his tongue softly playing with mine.
And I sigh, expelling a soft moan as I melt under his touch.
Warning signals are going off in my brain on the exact position we're in right now...us standing wrapped in each other's arms in Justin's bedroom with him only wearing boxers...and I gasp before pulling away from him, gazing into his deep glassy blues when I feel a familiar bulge, poking at my inner thigh. And I swallow hard, my entire body now a ball of nerves.
"Tai? You ok?" Justin questions, his hand coming up to caress my cheek as he looks at me. He releases a knowing smile before he grips my hand and pulls me towards his bed and I freeze momentarily before following behind him. "Lie down." He instructs and my eyes widen, causing him to chortle softly. "Lie down Tai. I'm not going to do anything. But, this time, you need to relax." He muses, causing me to giggle.
And I do just that, awkwardly crawling onto the mattress adored with a soft blue comforter and throw pillows.
I turn to face him and bite the bottom of my lip when he crawls over to me, placing his hands on either side of my half sitting form, hovering as he eyes me with interest.
"I have a question." Justin begins as he leans down to place teasing kisses on my lips.
"What?" I inquire, on the verge of pulling him down with me.
He needs to stop taunting me like this. Oh my god.
"How did you get up here? I specifically asked the guards not to let you up. I would have been back at work on Monday you know, handling the damage I know I probably caused with you and from not being at work this week and the whole letter to the editor thing."
So he knows he fucked up. But I don't care about that right now. I just want him to...
"Not helping Justin." I mutter mindlessly, lifting my hand to grope at his bare chest, trying to kiss him but he pulls away.
"I'm serious Tai. I'm really sorry but..."
"I get that you needed time, blah, blah, blah...shut up and kiss me!" I demand and Justin laughs, pulling away from me almost completely and I groan in frustration.
Is he trying to kill me? I think he knows exactly what he's doing to me and he's secretly enjoying it. Ugh!
He stands before me, crossing his arms and quirking his brows at me and I sigh in irritation.
"Look, Robert called and told your guards to let me up because he was worried about you. We did as much damage control as we could at work. I'm wondering why your dad hasn't fired me yet but it's whatever you know? Don't worry about it. We'll fix everything else on Monday." I say before stretching out my hands to grip him by the waist as I sit at the edge of his bed.
I part my legs and he walks up to stand between them, still gazing down at me with a hard expression on his face because I mentioned his brother no doubt. Hmm, he's really not talking to him huh? I hope they can overcome their egos soon because their father is long overdue for a visit from the both of them...together.
When he doesn't say anything, I roll my eyes, diverting my vision to his toned, cute stomach staring me right in the face.
"Rob's simply guilty, as he should be." Justin hums, looking away in thought but I ignore him, becoming mesmerized with his torso, my hands softly skimming over his stomach and chest as I memorize ever ripple and every freckle on his smooth light skin. "But, thanks for caring enough to come here and call me out on my shit. I messed up. But, I've got everything under control. I promise that when I get back to work, everything's going to change. Dad's going to get a dose of his own medicine. I have my shit all planned out." Justin continues and I nod mindlessly, my fingertips grazing his navel gently and he finally looks back down at me, an amused expression on his face. "Are you even listening to me Tai?"
"No." I reply honestly and he laughs.
"Well, ok then. I guess we'll continue this conversation another time."
"Yup." I mutter, finally caving completely, needing to feel and taste more of him. So, I lean forward, placing a delicate kiss just above his navel and he hisses softly, his body tensing before he relaxes under my touch.
"You know, you're the very first female to set foot inside of my room? That's epic considering whenever I had people over it was always my guest bedroom..." But he drifts, gulping down hard when I bite his flesh lightly before tracing my tongue over the mark.
I think he gets the hint. Less talking, more action. I don't care about anything else he has to say right now...
"Shut up Justin." I mumble and he breathes in deeply, frozen in place as I continue to explore him, my fingers gripping the waistband of his boxers.
"Ok..." He utters.
And I smile against his skin, placing butterfly kisses along his stomach before I slowly stand, trailing my way up to his chest until I make it to the soft flesh of his neck and his hands instantly fall to my waist, gripping me tightly, his fingers digging into my sides.
I pull away to stare at him, his blues wide and imploring as they bore through my browns.
His hands slowly travel north and he cups my cheeks in his palms, a small amorous smile gracing his face as he continues to examine me, his expression turning serious all of a sudden.
"Tai?" Justin whispers, his hot breath fanning my face and I smile weakly, trying to suppress the mass of emotions overpowering me right now.
"Hmm?" I reply in a sleepy murmur.
"I...I'm falling in love with you..." He chokes out, his voice barely above a whisper and my eyes widen, my body going rigid under his touch as I glare at him, never breaking eye-contact. Swallowing harshly, he takes in a deep breath, licking at his lips and my mind draws a complete blank when he says it again. "I love you Tai. I...I do." He speaks softly, pressing his lips to mine delicately before he pulls away to glare at me waiting for any type of reciprocation.
I open my mouth to say something, anything, but nothing comes out and I gasp in shock when my brain finally begins processing what he just said to me.
Oh my god! Oh my god! This is not happening right now. I, I've barely figured out what this is that we have and what makes us tick, what makes us work so well together...and now he drops that on me and oh my god!
When he realizes I'm paralyzed with shock he sighs, his hands dropping from my face before he pulls away from me completely, detaching our bodies.
No! No don't do that! Oh my god, I think I'm panicking...
"Right...uh...so..." Justin rubs the back of his neck nervously, his eyes flitting around his room as he avoids making eye-contact with me and aw, he's embarrassed.
His breaths are deep and uneven and if I didn't know any better I'd say he was trying his damn near hardest to control his emotions.
Oh gosh, I hope I didn't hurt him...or I hope he doesn't feel rejected...what the hell am I thinking? My mind is a mess of jumbled thoughts right now.
Shit, he said he loved me didn't he? I wasn't just hearing things was I?
Holy shit...
"Do you uh, want to get out of here and maybe grab a bite to eat?" He suggests, finally looking at me, giving me a sheepish grin.
"I'd like that." I smile, bowing my head slightly to avoid his questioning gaze and he nods.
"Sweet...I'll uh throw on some clothes and..."
"I'll leave..."
"No! No, I mean, I'm comfortable with you. You can stay. It's not like I'm butt ass naked. Besides, I'm already in my boxers here. You don't have to leave." He jokes, giving me an impish grin and I blush massively.
"Ok." I smile up at him and he nods, visibly relaxing a bit.
"Give me a few minutes and we'll head out...maybe to your side of town? And you can pick where we eat?" He suggests, moving past the open door of his bathroom to his wardrobe and I slowly follow behind him, taking in the shape of his broad back adorned with an angel tattoo.
"I'd like that." I voice as he begins digging through his draws.
Walking up behind him, I wrap my arms around his waist, standing partially to the side so I can see his reflection in the mirror.
He freezes with a pair of jeans in his grasp, his head snapping up as he eyes me through the mirror in curiosity.
I grin widely for him, placing a delicate kiss on his back and he bites his lower lip, still staring with a shy look on his face.
Ugh, make him stop! He's killing me softly here. He's too fuckin' adorable goddamn it!
But all of that is forgotten when I feel my heart racing, beating faster than I've ever felt it before as my entire body heats up.
"I love you too Justin..." I blurt out, nodding in affirmation, the words floating out of me much easier than I thought they would, and his eyes widen in uncertainty as he whips around in my arms to face me, looking down at me...
Wait did I really say that? Wow.
Well I'll be damned, Robert was right. I should have known.
But I knew it, I knew I was falling for Justin the moment I let him in. It simply took me a little while to really understand this...to understand us.
There's some type of mutual bond, some type of mutual attraction between us that's not only physical. It's almost like we're drawn to each other and really, ‘what's there not to love?'
"Tai, you didn't have to say it just because I...I mean I wanted you to know how I felt but you didn't...not if you're not ready..." He's rambling and it's cute but I silence him.
"Justin, shut up." I giggle and he smiles, his cheeks reddening by the second.
I love this vulnerable side of him. It lets me see that he's not afraid to let down his guard with me. That he trusts me and he's comfortable with me to let down his walls.
"I love you...I do." I say quoting him and he smiles one of his big ole smiles that I adore. "You've quickly become one of the most important persons in my life next to my brother and uncle. You mean a lot more to me than you realize and I love everything about you Justin...flaws and all." I conclude and he's speechless, searching my browns to see if I'm telling him the truth.
When he realizes that I'm being sincere, he heaves a sigh.
"You have no idea how much I needed to hear that." He confesses, finally speaking up and I think I know what he means. After all, I have a front row seat to his life now and...well, it's going to be a difficult road for him.
"Good, now can we please quit with the sappiness and get dressed so we can leave because I'm starving? I was never the girly, girly emotional type though you clearly seem to be." I giggle, teasing him, trying to lighten the atmosphere and it works.
Justin busts out in laugher, shaking his head at me before he whips back around to continue on his clothes hunt and I step away from him, still eyeing him...enjoying the view of him as I hope and pray that things will only continue to get better from here on out.
- FIN - |
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